Looking Out
by l1lyfl0w3r
Summary: Edward must have known I was going to the forest which meant he was watching me, which meant he was here. In Forks. And once again, I resumed my watch of the forest, looking out for him, just in case he returned again.


A/N: You have no idea how good it felt to type up another story after months! It felt so nice to get on Word and write whatever came to mind. It totally relaxed me! I love it!

Disclaimer: Nope, don't own.

Looking Out

I stared out the window, looking desperately towards the forest. It was more glaring then staring though. I knew he wasn't going to come back but that didn't stop my body from moving towards the window, to look out, to hope, to ponder, yearning to know if he was ever going to return and each time I glared, he never showed up. Not slightest flinch in the forest would catch my attention, snapping my head towards the direction which it came, waiting to see that bronze hair, those gold eyes in the forest. But everytime, I never did seem them. It was merely the window catching the leaves or an animal, tormenting me with my watch. Each time I glared out past those disgusting green trees, tears sprang from my eyes, blurring my vision. Every time a tear blurred my vision, I would furiously wipe it away, not wishing, not wanting to take the chance to miss him if he ever came back, even for a millisecond, just in case…

This was where Charlie found me after school on some day during the week of some month during whatever year. I didn't want to know the date, didn't want to know how long he had been gone. My legs were curled beneath me when I felt a hand on my shoulder. The touch scared me and I fell from the window still, onto the floor.

"Bells! Are you ok?!" Charlie kneeled down besides me on the floor. I shook my head and shot up from the ground. I was missing precious seconds of looking out for him…

I got back in my routinely position on the window still when I heard Charlie sigh.

"Bells, you've got to stop waiting." There was desperation in his tone. I ignored him and kept looking out.

"Bella, you are only hurting yourself more and more each time you stay up in your room. You've got to get out, hang with your friends. Go shopping!" I flinched from the word. Shopping…Alice loved to go shopping. She often took me shopping against my wishes. Charlie must have saw me flinched because I heard another sigh escape from his lips.

"Bella, seriously. Be reasonable, it's been 2 months since he left." I flinched again. Had it really been that long? I kept looking out. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Charlie starch his head.

"Your mom and I are worried about you Bells. This isn't healthy for you and it's apparent I'm not fit to take care of you during all of this." He paused. I wasn't really paying attention to him. "I've talked with Renee about this and we're both agreed that it's probably best if you live with your mother." That caught my attention. I sharply turned around.

"What? No! I refuse! It's too sunny in Florida!" No vampire would ever go there. If I went there, then all chances of him coming back where lost. Though, the spark of desire for him to return was growing dim quickly, I held strong to it. I refused to give in. Charlie looked confused and uncomfortable.

"Too late, Bella. Your mother is coming to get you tomorrow. You, uh, should probably get packing." With that, he walked out of my room. I was too shunned to look back out the window. Moving to Florida? What? Tears flooding my eyes and mind made a rash decision. I would run away. There was no way I would go back with Renee to that Vampire-No-Go place.

I ran over to my closest and grabbed the first bag I saw, went over to my dresser, grabs globs of cloths and shoved them in the bag and waited. It was already 8pm and the skies where getting dark. If I went now, Charlie would notice. So, I left when I was positive he was sleeping. It was midnight by the time I left and was walking towards the forest. Tears continued to cascade down my face as I traveled through the densely populated forest. On my way out the door, I had snatched food and a flash light. With the flash light in hand and tears in my eyes, I made my way through the forest. If Edward wasn't going to come back, then I would find him. With this thought of optimism, I trudged my way through the night.

By morning, my legs were killing me and my eyes were taking all my energy to keep open. What had I done? Did I seriously just walk out on Charlie like that? Thoughts flooded my mind and soon, I became very dizzy. The next thing I knew, I saw myself falling towards the earth, to tired and weak to do anything about it.

I could feel myself being picked up and carried away. I felt a familiar cold body holding me, I so wanted to open my eyes to confirm my suspicions but my eyes wouldn't budge. I was too weak from the night and everything. I knew I didn't have the most adequate diet the past couple of weeks, and so, add everything together; I didn't have the strength to move a muscle. My heart yearned for me to open my eyes, to speak, to verify that it was _him_ who was taking me somewhere, but I had the power not to do anything and so, I drifted back to sleep.

When I awoke, I felt my bed beneath me and bright lights in my eyes. It took me a few seconds to open my eyes and I found myself in my room. But how? I distinctly remember that I left home. Then it hit. Edward! After I fainted in the forest, Edward must have taken me back home! I looked around, joy flooding my heart, hoping with all my heart, mind and soul he was still here. He wasn't. Pain stabbed my heart, wrenching it open. I jumped from my bed, stormed all over my room, checking everything. In my dresser, closet, underneath my bed, but he was no where to be found. No words could describe how I felt. I broke then and there. I dropped to my knees, crying my soul out. Wailing, screaming, pulling my heart out; I just lost it. He was gone and he wasn't going to come back.

Charlie must have heard my screams as he came running into my room.

"Bells! You're back! You're alive!" He rushed to my side and hugged me, cradling me to his chest. I ignored him and continued crying. He wasn't the hard, cold stone body I wanted. He was to warm and soft. My tears carried on as he stroked my hair.

"Oh, Bella! I was so worried! I woke up and you weren't here. The school called saying you hadn't arrived. I looked everywhere for you. Thank goodness you're back!" He rocked me back and forth, trying to comfort me I guess. I wasn't listening to his words though. I was crying too hard to listen or care. All that matter was the epiphany I had that he wasn't coming back. But wait. He did come back. He was in the forest with me! I shot my head up. Charlie looked at me, concern and worry written all over his face and marked in his eyes.

"Bella, where did you go? What happend? " As always, I ignored him and got up and headed back to my spot on the windowsill. Edward must have known I was going to the forest which meant he was watching me, which meant he was here. In Forks. And once again, I resumed my watch of the forest, looking out for him, just in case, he returned again.


End file.
